If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
