Don't you send me to vm
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize