absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
