I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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