how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
