anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
