I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
