I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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