return my video game
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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