trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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