Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
