i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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