Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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