yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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