i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
