omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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