saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
