Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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