When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Randomize
