would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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