i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
