FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
