worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
