I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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