I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
i think i have herpe
just one?
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
