hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
