I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
