This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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