hotel room ftw
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
