I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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