remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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