How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
