Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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