The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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