apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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