is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
