last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
