You're a womanizer and a bitch.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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