he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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