He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
