bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
