can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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