I look better un-naked...
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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