My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
