Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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