i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
