Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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