Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Just cropdusted the office
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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