you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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