69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Man, jail baloney is awful.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize